What Is This I Don’t Even

This photo was taken by my teammate Kathleen Jones at the Lake Stevens Olympic distance triathlon over the weekend:

Lookin' good, stud

Three things:

  1. I’m pretty sure this isn’t legal for races (along with water wings, flippers, and a river boat fan strapped to your back)
  2. If you need this head snorkel device to swim, you probably shouldn’t be doing triathlons
  3. I bet this dude swims faster than me

If I saw this dude in the water before the race, I’d smuggle some Nerds into the lake and dump them into the snorkel before the gun went off. That’ll teach him!…yeah, he’s definitely a faster swimmer than me. They all are.

Update: According to Jason, who was un-lazy enough to do 30 seconds’ worth of research, the USAT apparently does allow snorkels, although the Subaru series and Ironman Canada does not. You could feasibly use a snorkel at Ironman Tempe or Coeur d’Alene, although you’d look like a humongous dweeb (albeit a potentially slightly faster swimming dweeb).