This photo was taken by my teammate Kathleen Jones at the Lake Stevens Olympic distance triathlon over the weekend: Three things: I’m pretty sure this isn’t legal for races (along with water wings, flippers, and a river boat fan strapped to your back) If you need this head snorkel device to swim, you probably shouldn’t be doing triathlons I bet this dude swims faster than me If I saw this dude in the water before the race, I’d smuggle some Nerds into the lake and dump them into the snorkel before the gun went off. That’ll teach him!…yeah, he’s definitely a...

Have I mentioned that triathlons are an effing expensive sport? Oh how I miss the “I only run” days — $120 for a good pair of running shoes a couple times a year is a laughable expense compared to what I bleed out every season for triathlons. Today Speedy Reedy happily took $270 from me. Between my time trial bike, countless fuel purchases, new tubes, and other paraphanalia, I think I single-handedly financed their move into a new building. Why was I at Speedy Reedy this time? Well, seeing as how I’m one of the unluckiest cyclists on our team, earlier this week I noticed a chunk...

I work out with a fairly big group of people, and the vast majority of the women have such an unreal wardrobe of workout apparel that it’s giving me quite the complex. Half of these girls look like fitness models, rocking out in cute, bright colored tops and pants. I, on the other hand, am not so blessed… Case in point: On Tuesday I show up at track wearing my Seafair pirate finisher’s shirt (arrrrrrghhh!) and a sad pair of shorts that make my stump legs look even shorter than usual. I also have some decidedly unattractive bags under my eyes and a sloppy ponytail. When doing my...

Last year was my first triathlon year, and since I wanted to do it on the cheap (well, as cheaply as I could, anyway), I borrowed a ton of gear from my friend, Christine. She lent me her old bike, swim caps, goggles, her race belt, timing chip anklet, and her old wetsuit. The wetsuit was a bit old but did its job — it prevented me from freezing to death in the chilly lake waters and it kept me buoyant. However, by the end of the season the wetsuit was starting to get even more loose fitting and tattered than when Christine had initially lent it to me — the left leg was starting to look like...

When Jason and I entered our freshman year of triathlons, we didn’t want to invest much money into the sport because we were unsure as to whether or not we’d like it. Scientifically speaking, triathlons cost a buttload of money. There’s running shoes, triathlon shorts, tri tops, proper running socks, visors, sunglasses, wetsuits, bikes, helmets, bike shoes, fuel, fuel and more fuel, not to mention the cost to sign up for races. That all adds up to a BUTT LOAD of cash. It ain’t cheap. But let me get back to the whole bike thing. Holy shit, if triathlons themselves cost a...